Kids, Smartphones, and Social Media Resource Kit
A running list of resources from the author of How to Break Up With Your Phone
Screen/Life Balance Resource Kit for Families
Hi everyone! Catherine Price here, author of How to Break Up With Your Phone, coach for The Guardian’s “Reclaim Your Brain” email series, and advocate for screen/life balance.
Thanks so much for your interest in taking steps to help our kids.
Here are some commonly requested resources, including information about smartphone alternatives, parental control settings, and app-blocking apps and devices.
I’ve also included a set of family guidelines and resources and links to my talk about kids, smartphones and social media, as well as more information about why it’s so important to rethink our approach to kids and technology..
Feel free to share any and all of these resources with anyone you’d like.
And to stay up-to-date with my writing on this subject, be sure to subscribe.
Special Request/PSA: Ask Your Rep to Support KOSPA
Please use this tool to ask your Congressional representatives to support the Senate version of the Kids Online Safety and Privacy Protection Act. This legislation would update the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (which was passed in 1998 and has never been updated) and would provide desperately needed protections for our kids. The Senate’s version was passed in July 2024 with an astonishingly bi-partisan vote of 91-3; Big Tech is now spending millions of dollars lobbying against it and trying to get it watered down. (Here’s a post I wrote with more info.) Many representatives have reported that, while they’ve heard a bunch from the tech lobbyists, they’ve received barely any calls in support of KOSPA from their constituents. The people at FairPlayForKids.org have created an extremely simple tool that will walk you through the process of calling and writing to your rep — it takes about 3 minutes and could make a BIG difference.
Ask Your Rep to Support the Senate Version of KOSPA
Printable/Shareable Guidelines and Resources
Here’s a google doc I put together for parents of my daughter’s school with some family guidelines. You can also check out this post I wrote for Jon Haidt’s Substack newsletter, After Babel.
Phone-Free Schools Resources
When we get smartphones out of schools from bell to bell (meaning for the entirety of the school day, including lunch, recess, and the transitions between classes), we are giving them 7 to 8 hours of freedom from incessant distractions and social pressure to be on their phones. To make advocacy easier, here are three Phone-Free Schools Action kits that I helped create for for The Anxious Generation website: one for parents, one for school administrators, and one for teachers and educators. In addition, I highly recommend downloading the Phone-Free Schools Movement's Phone-Free School Administrator Toolkit—it's a detailed, step-by-step guide for how to roll out a phone-free policy at your school (and is the closest I’ve found to a plug-and-play solution).
Suggested Smartphone/Social Media Roadmap:
As a reminder, I recommend following these steps:
Delay smartphones for as long as possible (until at least high school, but ideally until at least 16)
Start with a family “loaner” phone
When it’s time for your kid to have their own phone, start with a smartphone alternative
No social media until at least 16
Smartphone Alternatives:
Deciding not to give your kids smartphones doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get them any phone; it just means not giving them a phone that comes with social media and unfettered access to the internet. Thankfully, there are a lot of great smartphone alternatives on the market.
Alcatel Flip Phone (this is a great option for a family “loaner” phone)
Tello (service provider for Alcatel — they have a “pay as you go” plan, in addition to a more traditional monthly plan)
Gizmo Watch (Verizon)
Here’s a comprehensive guide that I put together that describes many of the features of these particular phones (I didn’t get to the Bark or the Garmin yet!)
3rd Party Tools & Solutions:
The Brick and Unpluq are cool gadgets that let you block all apps on your phone except for the ones you choose to allow — which is great if, say, you want your kid to only be able to use a phone to listen to podcasts or audio books, or if you want to take a break from your own phone for a while! (Note: the Brick does NOT work for iPads yet, unfortunately.)
There are also great app-blocking apps, including Freedom, ScreenZen, and Opal.
I reached out to a few of these companies and got discount codes, which you can find in this post (along with some additional information about these solutions). Bottom line: they’re all MUCH better than Apple’s Screen Time!
Parental Control Apps and Service Plans
You may also want to consider signing up for one of these “family protection plans,” offered by independent companies and as add-ons by cell/internet service providers, that have much more robust safety features and parental controls than the native parental control options on iPhones/Androids (more on which below). For example, you can set schedules for when certain apps are (and are not) available, or even set a schedule for times when internet access is available at your house.
Kids, Smartphones and Social Media: The Risks and the Solutions
The following is a talk I did for parents at my daughter’s school. Jonathan Haidt, author of The Anxious Generation, referred to it as “the talk every parent should watch” and “the video you should share with the parents of your kids’ friends.” Please feel free to do so! (The more people hear its message, the better.)
Guides to Parental Controls:
If your child(ren) has access to any other internet-enabled device (like an iPad), I recommend taking the time to learn about and set up parental controls for individual apps and devices (which are annoying and often easy for kids to get around, but we have to try!).
These are a few that I found — if you know of more, please tell me about them in a comment. It takes a village!
Comprehensive guide to parental controls on a wide variety of devices <—- Start here!!!
The New Mexico Department of Justice has put together a series of guides to privacy settings on some of the most popular social media apps and gaming platforms (scroll down on the page).
Comcast Parental Control Guide for XFinity
Common Sense Media’s Parent Resource Page
Common Sense Media “Ultimate Guide to Fortnite”
iOS:
How to Set Up Parental Controls With Family Sharing on iPhone (you’ll need to add your child to Family Sharing first)
How to Use Parental Controls on Your Child’s iPhone or iPad (this article lists all the iOS parental control features in one handy place)
How to Require Permission Before Your Child Downloads an App (note that if an app was previously installed and then was deleted, your child may be able to reinstall it without your permission)
Common Ways That Your Child Might Be Getting Around Parental Control & Screen Time Restrictions
Android:
How to Get Started With Google’s Family Link (If your child has a Google device or account, your first step should be to download the Family Link app, which will allow you to monitor and set limits for their online activities)
How to Set Up Parental Controls on Google Play (note that Google’s parental controls don't prevent restricted content as a search result or accessed through a direct link)
How to Manage Your Child’s Screen Time (including information on how to set daily and weekly screen time limits—both for overall screen time and for particular apps—and schedule “down times”)
How Do Kids Bypass Google’s Family Link? (Guess what: they can, and they do—sometimes in exceptionally clever ways!)
Additional Resources:
How to Break Up With Your Phone by Catherine Price (i.e. me) — an easy-to-read (appropriate for 13-year-olds through adults) look at why our phones and apps are designed to hook us and what our screen time is doing to us, coupled with a 30-day plan to take back control. It’s designed to help people of all ages create healthier relationships with technology and devices, and is a great thing to do as a family.
The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt (book making the case that we should roll back the “phone-based” childhood and restore the “play-based” childhood) - I’ve started directly collaborating with his team and am helping them build out resources for parents and school administrators. (Children’s edition coming fall of 2025!)
After Babel — Jon Haidt’s Substack newsletter, with lots of articles about the evidence behind the connection between social media and youth mental health. Also features posts by a young woman named Freya India, who writes compelling essays from her perspective as a member of Gen Z. I highly recommend subscribing.
ScreenStrong — great resource for parents whose kids are struggling with gaming (also has a great textbook about screen time and brain development)
Childhood Unplugged — excellent (and short!) book by Katherine Martinko about her own family’s practice of digital minimalism. It’s both philosophical and packed with practical advice.
Dr. Becky’s guide to setting boundaries as a parent (even before smartphones are an issue!)
NPR article about the redacted documents from the October 2024 lawsuits against TikTok (truly shocking)
Wall Street Journal video expose on how TikTok’s algorithm figures you out — parents, you need to watch this
Video of Sean Parker (first president of Facebook) and Chamath Palihapitiya (former VP of user growth at Facebook) talking about the platforms they created (this is the source of the clips I played in the talk)
FBI PSA about sextortion schemes on Roblox and other multiplayer games
Article about False Promises of Ed-Tech from After Babel (Jon Haidt’s substack newsletter)
Article about how Ed-Tech has failed from After Babel
Ed-Tech Triangle from Everyschool.org - tool to help school administrators and teachers evaluate which sorts of technology to allow in the classroom
Dino Ambrosi TEDx talk, “The Battle for Your Time: Exposing the Costs of Social Media” (in which he estimates that the average 18-year-old is on track to spend 93 percent of their remaining leisure time on a screen
“Family Media Plan” interactive tool from the American Academy of Pediatrics (helps you create a family plan for screen time limits, boundaries, etc)
Op-Ed by Surgeon General Vivek Murthy about why he’s calling for a warning label to be put on social media (akin to cigarettes)
Mark Zuckerberg interview on The Verge
My Substack post about Instagram’s Teen Accounts
“Gen Z has regrets”op-ed in the New. York Times about Gen Z’s feelings about social media platforms
Legal Decision revealing some of the tactics social media companies have employed to target schools and get kids in school to use social media (and some of the alleged effects that kids’ social media “addiction” has had on schools)